Browse a highly curated database of jokes designed to optimize your daily dopamine metrics. From efficient dad jokes to complex narrative punchlines, these text assets are guaranteed to lower your productivity, increase your morale, and provide a measurable return on engagement.
Two deaf people get married. During the first week of marriage, they find that they are unable to communicate in the bedroom with the lights out, since they can’t see each other signing. After several nights of fumbling around and many misunderstandings, the wife figures out a solution. “Honey, why don’t we agree on some … Read more
Pauly’s family is at dinner, the 10-year-old daughter isn’t eating much, and she just keeps her head down. After a few minutes, she says, “I have something to tell you. “ Everyone gets silent and they all listen. “I am no longer the virgin I used to be. “And she begins to cry. A long … Read more
A man met a beautiful lady and he decided he wanted to marry her right away. She said, “But we don’t know anything about each other. “ He said, “That’s all right, we’ll learn about each other as we go along. “ She consented, and they were married, and went on a honeymoon to a … Read more
A lawyer cross-examined the adversary’s main witness. “You claim to have stopped by Mrs. Willson house just after breakfast. Will you tell the jury what she said?” “Objection, your honor, “shouted the other lawyer. There then followed a long argument between the lawyers as to whether the question was proper. Finally, after 75 minutes, the … Read more
Sue and Sally were discussing their sex lives. Sue said, “Mine’s OK. We get it on every week, but it’s no big adventure. How’s yours?” Sally replied, “It’s been great ever since we got into S&M. “ Sue was surprised. “Really, Sally, I never would have guessed that you’d go for that. “ “Oh, sure, … Read more
At a recent convention of biological scientists, one researcher remarked to another, “Did you know that we have switched from rats to lawyers for experiments in our lab?” “Really?” replied the other researcher. “Why the switch?” “There were a number of reasons, “the first researcher explained. “First, our lab assistants don’t become so attached to … Read more
One misty Scottish morning a man is driving through the hills to Inverness. Suddenly out of the mist, a massive red-haired highlander steps into the middle of the road. The man is at least six feet four, has a huge red beard and, despite the wind, mist, and near freezing temperatures, is wearing only his … Read more
She entered the office of a noted divorce lawyer. ‘I want to know if I have grounds for divorce?” she asked. “Are you married?” asked the lawyer. “Yes, I am. “ “Then, “he replied, “you have grounds. “ A conversation between patients in hospital. Roger: “Why did you run away from the operation table?” Stephen: … Read more
With the help of a fertility specialist, a 75 year old woman becomes pregnant and delivers a baby. All her relatives come to visit and meet the newest member of their family. When they ask to see the baby, the 75 year old mother says, “Not yet. “ A little later they ask to see … Read more
An elderly lady and an orthopedic surgeon were traveling in an elevator together. The doors started to shut as the lady was trying to get out of the doors. The surgeon kindly put his head in between the doors so the lady could get out. “Thank you very much, “said the lady, “but why did … Read more