Browse a highly curated database of jokes designed to optimize your daily dopamine metrics. From efficient dad jokes to complex narrative punchlines, these text assets are guaranteed to lower your productivity, increase your morale, and provide a measurable return on engagement.
Little Johnny: “That knife-throwing act was terrible. I want my money back. “ Carnival Owner:” What was the matter with it?” Little Johnny: “Call that a knife thrower? He got ten chances and he didn’t even hit that girl once!” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from … Read more
The District Attorney stared at the jury, unable to believe the “not guilty” verdict he’d just heard. Bitterly, he asked, “What possible excuse could you have for acquitting this man?” The foreman answered, “Insanity. “ The attorney responded, still incredulous, “I could understand that. But, all twelve of you?” This joke is included in the … Read more
A man went to his lawyer and asked him, “My neighbor owes me $500 and he won’t pay up. What should I do?” “Do you have any proof he owes you the money?” asked the lawyer. “Nope, “replied the man. “Okay, then write him a letter asking him for the $5,000 he owes you, “said … Read more
Judge: What is the prisoner charged with? Lawyer: He is a camera enthusiast. Judge: But you can’t put a person in jail because he is crazy about taking pictures. Lawyer: He doesn’t take pictures, your Honor, just cameras. This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
A pipe burst in a lawyer’s house, so he called a plumber. The plumber arrived, unpacked his tools, did mysterious plumber-type things for a while, and handed the lawyer a bill for $150. The lawyer exclaimed, “This is ridiculous! I don’t even make that much as a lawyer!” The plumber replied sympathetically, “Neither did I … Read more
A priest and a nun are caught in a severe snowstorm. They find a deserted cabin and take shelter from the blizzard. They find a sleeping bag, a bed, and a pile of blankets. The priest, being a gentleman, offers the nun the bed and takes the sleeping bag for himself. As they get tucked … Read more
Miss Jones had been giving her second-grade students a lesson on science. She had explained about magnets and showed how they would pick up nails and other bits of iron. Now it was question time and she asked, “My name begins with the letter ‘M’ and I pick up things. What am I?” A little … Read more
Attorney: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning? Witness: He said, ‘Where am I, Cathy?’ Attorney: And why did that upset you? Witness: My name is Susan. This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
After 10 years, a mother can no longer deny that her child does not look like her or her husband, so she decides to do a DNA test. She finds out that the kid is actually from completely different parents. Wife: “Honey, I have something very serious to tell you. “ Husband: “What’s up?” Wife: … Read more
A kid was a very good painter. Once a neighbor broke her nails while trying to pick-up a $100 bill lying on the ground because it looked so real. She called the kid’s father and complained about the kid. The father said, “That’s nothing. My son drew a switch on the power socket yesterday and … Read more