The Kitchen Light – Mom See
“Mom, did you see my pills? They write LSD on the box outside!” “Screw the pills, didn’t you see the dragons in the kitchen?” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Jokes
Browse a highly curated database of jokes designed to optimize your daily dopamine metrics. From efficient dad jokes to complex narrative punchlines, these text assets are guaranteed to lower your productivity, increase your morale, and provide a measurable return on engagement.
Man’s Bag
A man filed a report to the police that his bag was stolen. Upon leaving the man’s apartment, the officer found the man’s bag at the bottom of the stairwell. It was a brief case. This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Weekend Retreat
A lawyer buys a farm as a weekend retreat. While walking round his new property he looks down and sees that his feet are in the middle of a huge cowpat. The lawyer starts yelling, ‘Oh my God! Help me, help me!’ His wife runs up and asks what’s the matter. The lawyer points to … Read more
Off Alzheimer Granny
A third old woman, full of happiness, asks her granddaughter; “My sweety, remind me please. . What’s the name of that German guy that blew my mind off… ?” “Alzheimer, granny!” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Drop Off Otherwise
Eleven people were hanging on a rope under a helicopter, ten men and one woman. The rope was not strong enough to carry them all, so they decided that one has to drop off, otherwise they are all going to fall. They were not able to choose that person, but then the woman made a … Read more
Clean Glass
Two women walked into a restaurant, the first one asked for tea. The second also asks for tea. “And make sure the glass is clean, “she tells the waiter. When the waiter returns with the two glasses of tea he asks, “Which one of you asked for the clean glass?” This joke is included in … Read more
Flight Attendants
An airliner was having engine trouble, and the pilot instructed the cabin crew to have the passengers take their seats and get prepared for an emergency landing. A few minutes later, the pilot asked the flight attendants if everyone was buckled in and ready. “All set back here, Captain, “came the reply, “except the lawyers … Read more
Shawn O’brian Grew
Two Irishmen, Patrick Murphy and Shawn O’Brian grew up together and were lifelong friends. But alas, Patrick developed cancer, and was dying. While on his deathbed, Patrick called to his buddy, Shawn, “O’Brian, come ‘ere. I ‘ave a request for ye. “ Shawn walked to his friend’s bedside and kneels. “Shawny ole boy, we’ve been … Read more
Tenth-Story Window He’s
A man fell out of a tenth-story window. He’s lying on the ground with a big crowd around him. A cop walks over and says, “What happened?” The guy says, “I don’t know, I just got here. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Hasn’t Changed Since
A doctor is talking to a car mechanic, “Your fee is several times more per hour then we get paid for medical care. “ “Yeah, but you see, doc, you have always the same model, it hasn’t changed since Adam; but we have to keep up to date with new models coming every month. “ … Read more