Humor , distilled.
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Latest Jokes
Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh
Menu Yet Mister
April 5, 2026
Waitress: Haven’t they given you a menu yet, mister? Starving customer: Yes, but I finished that half an hour ago. This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Sven Smiled
April 5, 2026
Sven and Tom were talking in the bar. Sven said, “I just got kicked off the course for breaking 60. “ Tom looked at him, amazed. “Breaking 60? That’s amazing!” Sven smiled and said, “Yeah, I never knew a golf cart could go that fast!” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes.
Kwame Points
April 5, 2026
Kwamei walks into a restaurant and wants to order chicken. Unfortunately, English is not his first language and he can’t remember how to say chicken in English. Kwame sees the guy at the table next to him with a plate with 4 boiled eggs on it. Kwame points to the plate of eggs and says
Each Peach
April 5, 2026
A man is arrested for stealing a can of peaches and is brought before the judge. The judge asks, “How many peaches were in the can?” The man replies, “Six, Your Honor. “ “In that case, you will go to jail for six days, one for each peach. “ Hearing that, his wife stands and
Arrived Greens Fee
April 5, 2026
An expectant mother was being rushed to the hospital, but didn’t quite make it. She gave birth to her baby on the hospital lawn. Later, the father received a bill, listing “Delivery Room Fee: $400. “ He wrote to the hospital and reminded them the baby was born on the front lawn. After a week
Taxi Driver
April 5, 2026
Judge: “Do you mix horse meat with chicken?” Defendant: “Yes, my lord. “ Judge; “How much?” Defendant: “50/50” Judge: “Please explain. “ Defendant: “One horse to one chicken. “ A totally naked woman rushed in a taxi. The taxi driver turned back and stared at her so keenly. The woman asked the taxi driver, “Why
Treding Jokes
The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.
Giorgio Rushes
April 5, 2026
Giorgo and his beautiful girl-friend Isabella rush in to see the vicar: “We want to get married. Here are all our papers, and these two people are our witnesses. Can you do a quick service?” The vicar is amused. He marries the two young people, pockets his fee and asks: “Isn’t there a proverb, something
Bites Yes
April 5, 2026
“Don’t be afraid of the dog, “said the lady to Little Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. “You know the old proverb, ‘A barking dog never bites?’“ “Yes, “replied Little Johnny. “You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?” This joke is included in the Black Book of
Trained Parrot
April 5, 2026
There was a little old lady who was nearly blind. She had three sons and they wanted to prove which one was the best son to her. So the first son bought her a 15-room mansion thinking this would surely be the best any of them could offer her. The second son bought her a