Officer Types

A new army computer is put through its paces. An officer types in a question, ‘How far is it from the barrack gate to the armory?’ The computer replies, ‘Seven hundred.’ The officer types, ‘Seven hundred what?’ The computer replies, ‘Seven hundred, sir!’ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can … Read more

Thrill Which

An artist, a lawyer, and a programmer are discussing the merits of a mistress. The artist tells of the passion, the thrill which comes with the risk of being discovered. The lawyer warns of the difficulties. It can lead to guilt, divorce and bankruptcy. The programmer says, ‘It’s the best thing that’s ever happened to … Read more

May Urinate

A lecturer who was drunk walked in a class. After a few minutes he wanted to urinate, he ran out and opened a zip slowly, so that he may urinate. After urinating, that’s when he realized that the zip he opened was for a jacket. This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. … Read more

Chew Louder

After a long time two friends met, happy to see each other. One of them, chewing on something big, asked his friend how he was and what was new in his life. After the friend told his story, he asked the same question to the friend who was chewing something. “So, what’s up man?” “It’s … Read more

Blind Nor Stupid

An ugly, fat, bad woman with two kids enters WalMart, shouting angry at the kids with no reason. The man at the reception says cheerfully to her: “Good morning and welcome to Wal-Mart. Cute kids! Are they twins?” The horrible woman stopped shouting, just enough to say, “Hell, they’re not twins… The older is 9 … Read more

Bathroom Scale

A woman noticed her husband standing on the bathroom scale, sucking in his stomach. “Ha¬¬! That’s not going to help, “she said. “Sure, it does, “he said. “It’s the only way I can see the numbers. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.