Jokes Ltd A Scottish man was at a baseball game. It was the first time he had ever seen the sport so he sat quietly. The first batter approached the plate, took a few swings and then hit a double. Everyone was on their feet screaming “Run, run!” This happened two more times, with a single and … Read more
Man visits India and meets an old man in the town square who is renowned for his elephantine memory. He asks the old man what he had for breakfast on the same day 15 years back. “Eggs, “replies the old man, the man scoffs at this saying everyone has eggs for breakfast and walks away. … Read more
A elderly lady, badly needing to use the restroom, walked into a local Hooters restaurant. The place was hopping with music and loud conversation and every once in a while the lights would turn off. Each time the lights would go out, the place would erupt into cheers. She walked up to the bartender, and … Read more
Guy goes to his psychiatrist and says “I’m in love with my dog. “ “Well that is not so unusual, millions of people love their dogs. “ “But doctor, you don’t understand. I’m physically attracted to my dog. I’m in love with my dog. “ “Well, is your dog male or female?” “Female, of course, … Read more
Pauly’s family is at dinner, the 10-year-old daughter isn’t eating much, and she just keeps her head down. After a few minutes, she says, “I have something to tell you. “ Everyone gets silent and they all listen. “I am no longer the virgin I used to be. “And she begins to cry. A long … Read more
A lawyer cross-examined the adversary’s main witness. “You claim to have stopped by Mrs. Willson house just after breakfast. Will you tell the jury what she said?” “Objection, your honor, “shouted the other lawyer. There then followed a long argument between the lawyers as to whether the question was proper. Finally, after 75 minutes, the … Read more
She entered the office of a noted divorce lawyer. ‘I want to know if I have grounds for divorce?” she asked. “Are you married?” asked the lawyer. “Yes, I am. “ “Then, “he replied, “you have grounds. “ A conversation between patients in hospital. Roger: “Why did you run away from the operation table?” Stephen: … Read more
With the help of a fertility specialist, a 75 year old woman becomes pregnant and delivers a baby. All her relatives come to visit and meet the newest member of their family. When they ask to see the baby, the 75 year old mother says, “Not yet. “ A little later they ask to see … Read more
An elderly lady and an orthopedic surgeon were traveling in an elevator together. The doors started to shut as the lady was trying to get out of the doors. The surgeon kindly put his head in between the doors so the lady could get out. “Thank you very much, “said the lady, “but why did … Read more
Doctor: Are you still taking the cough medicine I gave you? Patient: No, I tasted it and decided I’d rather have the cough. This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.