Jokes Ltd During the trade wars of the 18th century, bartering was quite common among seafaring merchants who needed laborers to load and unload their wares at each port. They were willing to trade just about anything to get strong, loyal workers. At one port, the captain of a merchant ship had his eye on a well-built, … Read more
A heavily bandaged man was sitting up in bed at the hospital when his friend came to visit. “What happened to you?” the friend asked. “Well, we went to the amusement park and decided to ride the roller coaster. As we came to the top of the highest loop, I noticed a sign by the … Read more
A guy driving a small car pulled up to a stop light next to a luxury car. He rolled down his window and shouted to the other driver, “Hey, buddy, that’s a nice car. You got a Hi-Fi sound system in your car? I’ve got a Hi-Fi sound system in my car!” The driver of … Read more
A big, burly man visited his pastor’s home and asked to see the minister’s wife, a woman well known for her charitable impulses. “Madam, “he said in a broken voice, “I wish to draw your attention to the terrible plight of a poor family in this district. The father of the family is dead, the … Read more
A couple attended marriage counseling to resolve communication problems. The fighting and bickering during the session was so bad the counselor called for a timeout and told them he was ending the session early but had an assignment for the husband. “John, “the marriage counselor said, “you’re an athletic guy… Here’s what I want you … Read more
A man went into a dentist and asked “How much will it cost to have teeth taken out?” . “$90” said the dentist. “That’s ridiculous, “said the man. “I could lose the anesthetic and it would cost $60”. ” That’s still too expensive, “said the man. ” “If I don’t use any anesthesia I could … Read more
To celebrate their fiftieth wedding anniversary, a couple returned to their honeymoon hotel. After retiring to bed, the wife said, “Darling, do you remember how you stroked my hair?” and so he stroked her hair. She reminded him of the way they had cuddled, and so they did. Then, with a sigh, she whispered, “Won’t … Read more
John asks his wife, Mary, what she wants to celebrate their thirtieth wedding anniversary. “Would you like a new Mink Coat?” he asks. “Not really, “says Mary. “Well how about a new Mercedes sports car?” says John. “No, “she responds. “What about a new vacation home in the country?” he suggests. She again rejects his … Read more
Don had just returned from two weeks of vacation. He asked his boss for two more weeks off to get married. “What!” shouted the boss. “I can’t give you more time now. Why didn’t you get married while you were off?” “Are you nuts?” replied Don. “That would have ruined my entire vacation!” This joke … Read more
A hunting party, hopelessly lost in the mountains, blamed their guide for leading them astray. “You told us you were the best guide in Minnesota!” they cried. “I am, “he said, “but I think we’re in Ontario now. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.