Jokes Ltd Two campers are walking through the woods when a huge brown bear suddenly appears in the clearing about 50 feet in front of them. The bear sees the campers and begins to head toward them. The first guys drops his backpack, digs out a pair of sneakers, and frantically begins to put them on. The … Read more
At a local gun show two guys were bragging about their wife’s abilities. “My wife’s a fine shot. She can hit a dollar every time. “ “That’s nothing. My wife goes through my trousers and never misses a dime. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from … Read more
A guy stuck his head into a barbershop and asked, “How long before I can get a haircut?” The barber looked around the shop full of customers and said, “About 2 hours. “ The guy left. A few days later, the same guy stuck his head in the door and asked, “How long before I … Read more
A photographer from a well-known national magazine was assigned to cover the fires at Yellowstone National Park. When the photographer arrived, he realized that the smoke was so thick that it would seriously impede or make it impossible for him to photograph anything from ground level. He requested permission to rent a plane and take … Read more
A man walks into the grocery store and asks to speak to the manager about buying all the rotten eggs. “What do you want with all the rotten eggs?” the manager asks. “Are you going to see the new comedian at the theater tonight?” “Sh-sh-sh!” hissed the buyer nervously. “I am the new comedian. “ … Read more
“Hello, “exclaimed Jonathan, as he met his friend Michael. “You’re looking a bit off color. Anything wrong?” “I’m afraid there is, “replied Michael, “I’ve had to give up drinking, smoking and gambling. “ “Well, I must say that’s all to your credit, “commended Jonathan. “Oh, no, it isn’t, “snapped Michael. “It’s due to my lack … Read more
Descartes walked into a bar and ordered a beer. “Want another?” asked the bartender. “I think not, “Descartes replied. Then he disappeared. This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Railroad agent: “Here’s another farmer who is suing us on account of his cows. “ Supervisor: “One of our trains has killed them, I suppose?” Agent: “No, he claims our trains go by so slow that the passengers lean out the window and milk them when they go by. “ This joke is included in … Read more
There was a preacher who fell in the ocean and he couldn’t swim. When a boat came by, the captain yelled, “Do you need help, sir?” The preacher calmly said “No, God will save me. “ A little later, another boat came by and a fisherman asked, “Hey, do you need help?” The preacher replied … Read more
Emma and Susan are talking. Emma declares that she’s finally got pregnant after years of trying. “How did you manage it?” asks Susan. “I went to that hypnotherapist on the High Street, “replies Emma. “I got pregnant within two months. “ “Oh, my husband and I tried seeing him years ago, “says Susan. “It didn’t … Read more