Jokes Ltd An elderly patient needs a heart transplant and discusses his options with his doctor. The doctor says, “We have three possible donors. One is a young, healthy athlete. The second is a middle aged businessman who never drank or smoked, and the third is an attorney who just died after practicing law for 30 years. … Read more
Before performing a baptism, the priest approached the young father and said solemnly, “Baptism is a serious step. Are you prepared for it?” “I think so, “the man replied. “My wife has made all the appetizers herself and we have a caterer coming in to provide plenty of sandwiches and cakes for all of our … Read more
Two elderly ladies were discussing the upcoming dance at the country club. “We’re supposed to wear something that matches our husband’s hair, so I’m wearing black, “said Mrs. Smith. “Oh my, “said Mrs. Jones, “I’d better not go. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
The husband was not home at his usual hour, and the wife was fuming, as the clock ticked later and later. Finally, about 3:00a.m. she heard a noise at the front door, and as she stood at the top of the stairs, there was her husband, drunk as a skunk, trying to navigate the stairs. … Read more
Doctor: “Liquor is a slow poison for you. “ Patient: “It’s all-right. I’m not in a hurry. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
There is a girl walking up the stairs in a church one day. As the priest is walking by, he looks up and notices that this girl is not wearing any panties. He then calls the girl and gives her $50 and says “Little girl, take this money and buy yourself some panties as it … Read more
Three mischievous old Grannies were sitting on a bench outside a nursing home when an old Grandpa walked by. And one of the old Grandmas yelled out saying, “We BET we can tell exactly how old you are. “ The old man said, “There is no way you can guess it, you old fools. “ … Read more
A man was recently flying to New York. He decided to strike up a conversation with his seatmate. “I’ve got a great policeman joke. Would you like to hear it?” “I should let you know first that I am a policeman. “ “That’s OK. I’ll tell it to you really slowly!” This joke is included … Read more
One evening, a family brings their frail, elderly mother to a nursing home and leaves her, hoping she will be well cared for. The next morning, the nurses bathe her, feed her a tasty breakfast, and set her in a chair at a window overlooking a lovely flower garden. She seems okay but after a … Read more
Two friends meet each other on the street. “Hello! Where are you coming from?” asked Bill. “Oh, don’t ask me! I’m coming from the cemetery. I just buried my mother-in-law” replied Sid. “I’m so sorry!” said Bill, “But why is your face scratched all over?”. “It wasn’t so easy!” said Sid, “She put on a … Read more