A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him a question. The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the footpath, and stopped centimeters from a shop window. For a second everything went quiet in the cab, then the driver said, “Look mate, don’t ever … Read more
A professor was walking along a very narrow street when he came face to face with a rival professor. The street was too narrow for two to pass. The rival, pulling himself up to his full height, said haughtily: “I never make way for fools!” Smiling, the professor stepped aside and said: “I always do. … Read more
The other day, Nancy and Herbert got into some petty argument but neither of them would admit the possibility that we might be in error. To her credit, Nancy finally said, “Look. I’ll tell you what. I’ll admit I’m wrong if you admit I was right. “ “Ok. Fine. “Herbert said. She took a deep … Read more
A young lad went to a tailor shop in Scotland. He told the tailor, “I’d like ye to make me a kilt with this material here, and if ye don’t mind, I’d like ye to make me a pair of matching underwear for it. I hear it gets a might drafty up dem tings. “ … Read more
Two girlfriends were talking to each other about relationships. “I put an ad in one of those singles websites looking for a boyfriend. “ “What kind of guy did you say you were looking for?” “I wanted an ambitious guy who likes to dig in to get the job done and is really down to … Read more
The attorney tells the accused, “I have some good news and some bad news. “ “What’s the bad news?” asks the accused. “The bad news is, your blood is all over the crime scene, and the DNA tests prove you did it. “ “What’s the good news?” “Your cholesterol is within limits. “ This joke … Read more
A businessman tells his friend that his company is looking for a new accountant. His friend asks, “Didn’t your company hire a new accountant a few weeks ago?” The businessman replies, “That’s the accountant we’re looking for. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Two men were loading up a hearse with a coffin on a steep incline. After they loaded the cargo, they both get into the vehicle. As they start to pull away, the back door swings wide open and the coffin crashes to the ground and starts sliding down the incline, across the intersection, into the … Read more
This guy was having a problem with mice in his apartment. “Dude, “he told a friend, “I’ve tried everything and those damn mice keep coming back. “ “I had the same thing man, “his friend says. “All you have to do is stuff steel wool in their little holes. “ “That’s it?” the guy asked. … Read more
The following conversation took place after a recently deceased Pakistani man knocked on the gates of Heaven for about 5 minutes. St. Peter: “What do you want? “ Pakistani man: “I’m here for Jesus. “ St. Peter: “Jesus, your taxi’s her! “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order … Read more