Jokes

Browse a highly curated database of jokes designed to optimize your daily dopamine metrics. From efficient dad jokes to complex narrative punchlines, these text assets are guaranteed to lower your productivity, increase your morale, and provide a measurable return on engagement.

Cool Watch

by

Little Johnny was at school one day, when he noticed that there was a large crowd of kids gathered around Little Billy. Little Johnny walks up to Little Billy and says “Hey what’s all the excitement about”, Little Billy says “Just showing everyone my new watch”. Little Johnny goes “Wow, that’s a cool watch where … Read more

Bank President

by

A little old lady entered the main branch of a large downtown bank with a large grocery bag in her arms. She told the teller that she wanted to open an account to make a substantial deposit, in excess of $200,000. Further, she said that since such a large sum was involved, she would deal … Read more

Train Cause We’re

by

A few days after Christmas, a mother was working in the kitchen listening to her young son playing with his new electric train in the living room. She heard the train stop and her son said, “All of you sons of bitches who want off, get the hell off now, cause this is the last … Read more

Survivor Finds

by

A man, a woman, and a great survivor are trapped on an island. The survivor finds a bunch of coconuts. The man thinks to himself, “What if there are other people on the island? Then we won’t be stranded!” He threw coconuts at nearby ships, and the island was populated. Everybody looks at him cross. … Read more

Teenager Won’t

by

A teenage girl come home from school and asks her mother, “Is it true what Rita just told me?” “What’s that?” asks her mother. “Do babies come out of the same place where boys put their penises?” said her daughter. “Yes it is dear!” replies her mother, pleased that the subject had finally come up … Read more