Browse a highly curated database of jokes designed to optimize your daily dopamine metrics. From efficient dad jokes to complex narrative punchlines, these text assets are guaranteed to lower your productivity, increase your morale, and provide a measurable return on engagement.
An elderly patient needs a heart transplant and discusses his options with his doctor. The doctor says, “We have three possible donors. One is a young, healthy athlete. The second is a middle aged businessman who never drank or smoked, and the third is an attorney who just died after practicing law for 30 years. … Read more
Before performing a baptism, the priest approached the young father and said solemnly, “Baptism is a serious step. Are you prepared for it?” “I think so, “the man replied. “My wife has made all the appetizers herself and we have a caterer coming in to provide plenty of sandwiches and cakes for all of our … Read more
Two elderly ladies were discussing the upcoming dance at the country club. “We’re supposed to wear something that matches our husband’s hair, so I’m wearing black, “said Mrs. Smith. “Oh my, “said Mrs. Jones, “I’d better not go. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
A man is strolling past the mental hospital and suddenly remembers an important meeting. Unfortunately, his watch has stopped, and he cannot tell if he is late or not. Then, he notices a patient similarly strolling about within the hospital fence. Calling out to the patient, the man says, “Pardon me, sir, but do you … Read more
When the office printer color started to look a little off the manager called the local repair shop. To the manager’s surprise, the clerk said that it would cost $50 but that he might try reading the manual and doing it himself. The manager replied in astonishment, “Does your boss know that you discourage business … Read more
A guy walked into his friend’s office. He found his friend sitting at his desk, looking very depressed. “Hey, what’s up with you?, “he asked. “Oh, it’s my wife, “replied the man sadly. “She’s hired a new secretary for me. “ “Well, nothing wrong in that, “he said, “Is she blonde or brunette?” “Neither. He’s … Read more
A young, freshly minted lieutenant was sent to a foreign country as part of the peacekeeping mission. During a briefing on landmines, the captain asked questions. Our intrepid soldier raised his hand and asked, “If we do happen to step on a mine, Sir, what do we do?” “Normal procedure, Lieutenant, is to jump 200 … Read more
A man left for work one Friday afternoon. Instead of going home, he stayed out the entire weekend hunting with the boys and spending all his wages. When he finally got home on Sunday night, he was confronted by his very angry wife. After two hours, she stopped nagging and said, “How would you like … Read more
After 5 hours sitting in the bar, a man was in no shape to drive, wisely left his car parked and walked home. As he was walking unsteadily along, he was stopped by a policeman. “What are you doing out here at 2 am?”, said the officer. “I’m going to a lecture, “the man said. … Read more
A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey. He orders a drink, and while he’s drinking, the monkey jumps all over the place, eating everything behind the bar. Then the monkey jumps on to the pool table and swallows a billiard ball. The bartender screams at the guy, “Your monkey just ate the … Read more