Browse a highly curated database of jokes designed to optimize your daily dopamine metrics. From efficient dad jokes to complex narrative punchlines, these text assets are guaranteed to lower your productivity, increase your morale, and provide a measurable return on engagement.
The teacher wrote on the blackboard: “I ain’t had no fun in months. “ Then asked the class, “How should I correct this sentence?” Little Johnny raised his hand and replied, “Get yourself a new boyfriend. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Little Johnny walks into his dad’s bedroom and sees him sliding on a condom. His father tries to hide it by bending over, as if to look under the bed. Little Johnny asks curiously, “What are you doing, Dad?” His father quickly replies, “I thought I saw a mouse go underneath the bed. “ Little … Read more
Little Johnny was starting his first day at a new school and his father called the teacher to tell her that little Johnny was a big gambler. She said that it was no problem and she has seen worse than that. After Little Johnny’s first day at his new school his father called the teacher … Read more
A computer programmer has been missing from work for over a week. Finally someone notices and calls the police. They break down the door of his flat where they find him dead in the shower, an empty bottle of shampoo next to his body. The programmer seems to have died from a combination of exposure … Read more
A woman was suspicious of the loyalty of her husband for a long time and she decided to make him jealous. “My love, what would you say if I was having sex with your best friend?” “I’d say you’re a lesbian!” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it … Read more
Hitler calls a meeting of his best soldiers and commanders and tells them “Alright I want to order the assassination of one thousand jews and four hedgehogs. “ Then one of his generals stands and says “But… Mein fuhrer why four hedgehogs?” Hitler then smiles and says “See? No one gives a f*ck about the … Read more
The pretty teacher was concerned with one of her eleven-year-old students. Taking him aside after class one day, she asked, “George, why has your school work been so poor lately?” “I’m in love, “the boy replied. Holding back an urge to smile, she asked, “With whom?” “With you, “he said. “But George, “she said gently, … Read more
A Jewish grandmother is giving directions to her grown grandson who is coming to visit with his wife. “You come to the front door of the apartments. I am in apartment 301. There is a big panel at the front door. With your elbow, push button 301. I buzz you in. Come inside and elevator … Read more
A Jewish man walks into a bar and sits down. He has a few drinks, then he sees a Chinese man and punches him in the face. “Owch!” the Chinese man says. “What was that for?” “That was for Pearl Harbor, “the Jewish man says. “But I’m Chinese!” “Chinese, Japanese, what’s the difference?” And the … Read more
Two Jewish guys are walking when one notices a sign on a Catholic church that says “Convert to Christianity, and we’ll give you $100. “ The one says to the other, “should we do it?” The other says “NO! ! Are you crazy?” The first guy replies “Hey, a hundred dollars is a hundred dollars… … Read more