A motorist gets caught in an automated speed trap that photographs his car. He later receives a ticket in the mail for $40 with a photo of his car. Instead of payment, he sends the police department a photograph of $40. A few days later, he gets a letter from the police department with a … Read more
Before performing a baptism, the priest approached the young father and said solemnly, “Baptism is a serious step. Are you prepared for it?” “I think so, “the man replied. “My wife has made all the appetizers herself and we have a caterer coming in to provide plenty of sandwiches and cakes for all of our … Read more
There is a girl walking up the stairs in a church one day. As the priest is walking by, he looks up and notices that this girl is not wearing any panties. He then calls the girl and gives her $50 and says “Little girl, take this money and buy yourself some panties as it … Read more
A man and his wife, both recently retired, went into town to buy some milk and bread. They were only in the store for about five minutes, but when they came out, they noticed a police officer writing a parking ticket, clearly about to place it on their car. “Come on, man, how about giving … Read more
Three dead bodies turn up at the mortuary, all with very big smiles on their faces. The coroner calls the police to tell them what has happened. “First body: Frenchman, 65, died of heart failure while making love to his mistress. Hence the enormous smile, Inspector”, says the Coroner. “Second body: Scotsman, 28, won a … Read more
After 5 hours sitting in the bar, a man was in no shape to drive, wisely left his car parked and walked home. As he was walking unsteadily along, he was stopped by a policeman. “What are you doing out here at 2 am?”, said the officer. “I’m going to a lecture, “the man said. … Read more
A young employee is working late at the office one evening. As he comes out of his office he sees the CEO standing by the classified document shredder in the hallway, a piece of paper in his hand. “Do you know how to work this thing?” the CEO asks. “My secretary’s gone home and I … Read more
A policeman had a perfect spot to watch for speeders, but was not getting many. Then, he discovered the problem; a 10 year old boy was standing up the road with a hand painted sign which read, “SPEED TRAP AHEAD”. The officer then found a young accomplice down the road with a sign painted “TIPS” … Read more
A man in a hurry taking his ten-year-old son to school made a turn at a red light where it was prohibited. “Uh-oh, I think I just made an illegal turn!” the man said. “It’s okay, Dad, “the boy said, “The police car right behind us did the same thing. “ This joke is included … Read more
A guy finds his dog with the neighbor’s pet rabbit in its mouth. The rabbit is dead and the guy panics. He takes the dirty, chewed up rabbit into the house. He gives it a bath, blows dry its fur, and puts it back into the cage at the neighbor’s house, hoping they will think … Read more