Jokes Ltd A tourist was admiring the necklace worn by a local Indian. “What is it made of?” she asked. “Alligator teeth, “the Indian replied. “I suppose, “she said patronizingly, “that they mean as much to you as pearls do to us. “ “Oh no, “the Indian objected. “Anybody can open an oyster. “ This joke is … Read more
A man in a bar visited the men’s room, leaving his drink on the bar. On his return he found that someone had drunk it. The next time he left a notice beside his drink. “I spat in this”. On his return he found it written underneath “So did I”. This joke is included in … Read more
In one small rural town the sheriff also fulfilled the role of the town’s veterinarian. One night the phone rang, and his wife answered. An agitated voice inquired, “Is your husband there?” “He is, but tell me, do you need him as the sheriff or the vet?” the wife asked. “Both!” was the reply. “We … Read more
A man walks into a bar, and tells the bartender to pour him a 12 year old single malt scotch “before the trouble starts. “ The bartender pours his drink and quietly moves away. After finishing his drink, the man calls the bartender back and tells him “pour me a 15 year old scotch before … Read more
A young man enters a bar and sees a beautiful lady at the counter. He moves closer to her and starts a conversation. Man: “Hello beautiful… “ Woman: “Hi. “ Man: “My name is Solomon. “ Woman: “So?” Man: “Lomon. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it … Read more
A doctor asks a patient while examining her: “How many sex partners did you have?” “Five or six, I don’t remember exactly. . “ “Hmm, not that many… “ “Yes, that wasn’t the most successful weekend indeed. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
An alcoholic wakes up in jail. He asks the first police officer he sees, “Why am I here?” “For drinking, “replies the officer. “Great, “says the man, “when do we start?” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
A woman and her son were taking a cab in New York City. It was raining and all the hookers were standing under the awnings. “Mom, “said the little boy, “what are all those women doing?” “They’re waiting for their husbands to get off work, “she replied. The cabbie turns around and says, “Geez lady, … Read more
Eight hours into his trial Paddy pleads guilty. “Why didn’t you plead guilty at the beginning and save the court’s time?” The judge demanded. “Well, “Paddy responded, “until I heard all the evidence I thought I was innocent. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Woman customer in restaurant: “I’d like a margarita please. “ Waiter: “I’ll need to see your ID. “ Customer,giggling while showing her ID: “Do you think I look like a teenager?” Waiter: “No. I thought you qualified for our senior citizen discount. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can … Read more