Jokes Ltd The wise old Mother Superior was dying in a monastery hidden in the mountains’ hills. The nuns gathered around her bed trying to make her comfortable. They gave her some warm milk to drink, but she refused it. Then one nun took the glass back to the kitchen. Remembering a bottle of Irish whiskey received … Read more
Nurse: Doctor, there is a man in the waiting room with a glass eye named Brown. Doctor: What does he call his other eye? This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
One day Jane met Tarzan in the jungle. She was very attracted to him, and during her questions about his life she asked him what he did about sex. “What’s that?” he asked. She explained to him what sex was and he said, “Oh, Tarzan uses a hole in the trunk of a tree!” Horrified, … Read more
A village doctor was awakened at 4 a. m. to make a house call. He reluctantly got dressed and braved a snowstorm. After the examination, he told the patient to send immediately for his lawyer and relatives and friends and make a will. When he got home he told his wife what he had seen … Read more
The judge: “Why did you shoot the rabbit without being a member of the hunters association?” The inculpated: “Why did the rabbit eat vegetables from my garden, without being a family member?” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Two prisoners are talking about their crimes: George: “I robbed a bank, and they gave me 20 years” Herman: “Hmm. I killed a man, and I’m here for 3 days” George: “*What? I rob a bank and get 20 years; you kill a man and get 3 days???” Herman: “Yeah, the man was a lawyer. … Read more
A little old lady was walking down the street dragging two large plastic garbage bags behind her. One of the bags was ripped and every once in a while a $20 fell out onto the sidewalk. Noticing this, a policeman stopped her, and said, “Ma’am, there are $20 bills falling out of that bag. “ … Read more
A mother shark is teaching her young how to eat humans. “First, you go straight at them and then you circle them. You go straight at them again and circle them again. Finally, you go straight at them and then you eat them” “But, mom, why can’t I just eat them the first time around?” … Read more
A college professor in an anatomy class asked his students to sketch a naked man. As the professor walked around the class checking the sketches, he noticed that a sexy young coed had sketched a man with an erect penis. The professor commented, “Oh, no, I wanted it the other way. “ She replied, “What … Read more
An elderly, wealthy woman was on the beach and boring fellow beachcombers as she bragged on and on about her two remarkable grandchildren. Unable to stand it any longer, a fellow sunbather interrupted her. “Tell me, how old are your grandsons?” The grandmother gave a grateful smile and replied, “The doctor is four and the … Read more